John and Sun-Ling's China Adventures: We go to a wedding OR John gives a speech

Last weekend we attended a wedding in Nantong, China, a medium-size city on the north bank of the Yangtze River, about 3 hours from Shanghai. One of my team members, Wang Ning, was getting married and she invited me to be the ZhengHunRen or "Master Witness". More about that later.

The wedding was Saturday at 6PM and early that afternoon the car that Wang Ning arranged for us arrived at 1:00 PM. The driver was one of those "professional" drivers who makes every maneuver possible to gain advantage including driving on the wrong side of the road. ;-)

We made good time and arrived at the Yangtze River Ferry at 3PM. The major cities of the Yangtze river delta - Shanghai, Nanjing, Hangzhou, Suzhou, Ningbo, and Wuxi - are south of the river. Nantong is to the north and is not as well known although she claims to be "the first modern city in China". More later.

There is a new bridge across the Yangtze just south-east of Nantong that will open next April, but for now we have to ride the ferry. The driver knew exactly how to work the system to beat the long lines and we wound up waiting for only 10 minutes instead of hours. Literally he just drove directly to the front of the line.

These ferries were similar, maybe identical, to the ones we rode this spring to cross the Yangtze at Zhenjiang. It was raining so I did not get out of the car to take photos.

We got to Nantong about 4:10. Wang Ning and soon-to-be-husband Shen Tao were waiting to greet us at the Youfei Hotel, the only 5-star hotel in Nantong. The bride and groom escorted us to our room. This was our first chance to meet the groom, an entrepreneur from Nantong, and he seemed like a really good guy.

Room 616 in tower B was excellent. We took a nice short nap before dressing and heading downstairs at 6PM for the wedding.

Sandy, who had ridden with us from Shanghai, was the sign-in lady. We signed in and had our photo taken with the bride and groom. We also had a brief chance to meet both sets of parents who were very cordial.

The Chinese pre-wedding rituals are distinctly different from those in the US. In the US, the bride and groom do not see each other the day of the wedding and the "photo taking" and "receiving line" occur between the ceremony and the reception (while I'm usually starving). ;-)

In China, the bride and groom and their families greet the guests as they arrive, photos are taken with each guest, and gifts (red packets) are received. I like it.

The wedding was on the 3rd floor in a very luxurious banquet room with 28 X 10-person tables. We were seated in the 2nd row of tables. The decorations were fabulous - lots of white flowers. See the photos.

The wedding banquet started on time at 6:48 (according to Sandy). The bride and groom walked down the aisle to the stage amid some very loud welcomes by the M.C. yes, the MC. No minister as this is the wedding ceremony not official civil marriage.

Next, I was introduced as the ZhengHunRen and I walked up to the stage with spotlights blazing, and gave my speech - in Chinese. Basically the ZhengHunRen, or Master Witness, is a respected family member, friend, work colleague, or former teacher who gives a short 3-part speech: a welcome, a few kind words about the bride and groom, and a concluding "may you be united forever, in sickness and health, etc, etc".

I was happy to get my speech over with early as I had been practicing it in Chinese for a week and was of course nervous. Much thanks to Sun-Ling and my colleagues at work for their help and encouragement.

The wedding then proceeded with all the usual bits. The tower of champagne glasses, candle lighting, toasting, exchanging of rings, eating, etc. There was a new twist that I had not seen before at a Chinese wedding - a band performed about 5 songs while we were eating.

The food was excellent and the red wine was tasty. We toasted the bride and groom, the bride's parents, the groom's parents, and finally the bride and groom again before the wedding wound down around 9PM.

We went back up to our room were I ditched my coat and tie and we headed out for stroll. The rain had stopped and we were treated to the first comfortable evening of the summer. Nantong has many canals and bridges. We made a short circuit, and on the way saw a magnificent art deco building from the early 1950's. A real gem. Awesome.

Crashed around 10:30.

Slept in a bit on Sunday. Had a very good breakfast at the hotel and then Wang Ning's parents picked us up for a short tour around Nantong. First stop: a daylight photo op at the art deco building. Second: the home of Zhang Jian (1853 - 1926), nicknamed the “King of Nantong” who started the Nantong Institute of Technology, the first textile college in China, and founded the first private museum in China. Thus the city tag line of "the first modern city in China".

Then to the nearby Wang family home. A neat old style compound. We drank tea and chatted with grandmother Wang who is the only family member living there now.

Then a brief visit to the nearby Tianning Buddhist temple - very cool. Took lots of photos.

Then over to the apartment of the newlyweds - big and new - before heading off to lunch. Finished lunch around 2PM, went back to hotel, packed, and checked out. The driver had us back at our apartment at 5:30.

It was not raining so I took a ton of photos on the ferry.

Some photos are below. To see all the photos click here.

The bride and groom greet guests and take photos.